Zombies are great. Don’t get us wrong. We love the undead little suckers. But let’s face it. The real world is a little depressing right now, and we usually like to tune in to TV to escape. That’s why we’re proposing something a little bit different for our favorite post-apocalyptic drama “Fear the Walking Dead”: lighten up a little.
We know, we know. Bleakness is your jam, but every once in awhile it can be fun to experiment and mix things up a little with a more lighthearted episode. That’s why we’d like to propose five classic “fun” episode tropes to making us stop “Fearing” those walking dead and start “Lovin’” ‘em.
THE FAMILY VACATION EPISODE
Remember how awesome those “Brady Bunch” episodes were when the family went to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon? A vacation episode is the ideal way to shake things up. “Fear the Walking Dead” is a pretty suspenseful show, but honestly, don’t all apocalyptic storylines need a little infusion of fun now and then? We humbly propose a wacky family vacation episode to shake things up.
Since everyone is already at sea headed for Baja, Mexico—why not swing by a family fun resort for a little R&R? Think Club Med, or in this case, Club Undead. We imagine the Clark and Salazar fams could score a seriously deep discount on an all-inclusive vacay right now. And since half the guests only eat brains anyway, that means more danish at the breakfast buffet for the uninfected. Plus, how fun would it be to watch zombies parasail?
THE PROM EPISODE
Look, just because half of the world is bleeding out their eyeballs does NOT mean it’s OK for Alicia Clark to miss her prom. It’s a pivotal moment in every teen girl’s life, and skipping out on it really WOULD be the end of the world. Just imagine how amazing it’s going to be when the undead DJ starts spinning “Thriller” and everyone starts spontaneously doing “the” choreographed dance. And since most of Alicia’s classmates are too busy munching on cadavers to attend, that means she’s a lock for prom queen. It doesn’t matter if she seems to “alt” to care about such titles. Once she slaps on that tiara, she’ll be totes psyched.
Plus, she can trade it for food and water after the prom is over and she and her family are back out in the hot sun trying to survive.
THE MUSICAL EPISODE
“FTWD’s” ensemble cast and recurring “chorus” of zombies are just screaming for a musical episode. We propose a guest appearance from Lin-Manuel Miranda as himself—but undead. Heck, why not write in a plot twist where the entire cast of “Hamilton” has been infected, but still decides to take their hit show on a national tour? Just think about how exciting it would be to watch a massive jazz dance number with zombies, not knowing if or when a random appendage will come flying off their body into the audience? We smell another Tony—and also rotting flesh—but most definitely a Tony, too.
THE HOLIDAY EPISODE
All great comedies and dramas in TV history have done their “very special” holiday episode, and is there any greater time to celebrate the importance of family, sacrifice, comfort, and joy than a post-apocalyptic zombieland? We propose ‘FTWD’ does a classic “Christmas Carol” type episode with Madison Clark as Ms. Scrooge—and the undead playing everyone else. Just think about how adorable an Undead Tiny Tim would be—and we don’t even have to worry about him getting sick and dying, cause he’s already there.
THE BIRTH EPISODE
Nothing turns a show about death around like a birth episode—and just think of all of the potential for wacky post-apocalyptic birth hijinks. Good luck getting to the hospital on time when the highway is jam packed with dead bodies! Awk-waaaaaaard! And since all of the good medication at the hospital has been used up by people who’ve had their limbs ripped off, looks like this birth is going to be “all natural” all the way. Plus, since the baby is undead anyway, looks like he can chomp right through his own umbilical cord no problem.