South Park and Eric Cartman go together like Randy Marsh and Lorde – they are, in fact, one and the same and probably shouldn’t be watched by children under a certain age.
If not for his rapport with Kyle, Stan, and Kenny, Cartman would have become number one on America’s Most Wanted list long ago.
Though in many ways the show is untraditional to say the least, it’s entirely accurate to say that Cartman is often utilized to perfection as the classic TV enemy or villain (when he’s not helping the protagonists for his own means of course). He schemes, cajoles, and manipulates to get what he wants, often with zero regard for how his actions will affect his “friends” and the world as a whole. In fact, if it hurts the world as a whole that’s usually a bonus. This is the spoiled child who has dressed as Hitler, beat up a disabled child, led countless hate marches, and forced Scott Malkinson to eat his own dead parents. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg!
Here are just a few of his best moments:
One of my favorite Cartman-centric episodes culminates in the reveal that Santa Claus is the illegal source of the NSA’s ability to track the movements of American citizens. Cartman, in a cynical Edward Snowden homage, informs the public but it turns out no one really cares that the NSA watches them.
Mrs. Garrison (the transgendered Mr. Garrison) is furious that her ex, Mr. Slave, is going to marry Big Gay Al after the governor legalizes same-sex marriage so she uses a class project about taking care of eggs to prove that only heterosexual couples can successfully take care of children. When Cartman breaks his, but Garrison refuses to give him a poor grade, he just can’t get over it.
Buying into the hype of the Nintendo Wii has Eric going crazy leading up to its release, hanging around the game store and falling into a sleepless cycle of delusion. His mania is a delight to watch.
Eric Cartman is an unstoppable force, for all the wrong reasons, but we love him all the more for it. Now respect his authoritah!
Want to see more awesome Cartman moments? Click here to see the collection we’ve put together.