Earlier this season on “Modern Family,” Mitchell and Cam decided to “interview” their family members to determine which would be the best candidates to become their adopted daughter Lily’s guardians should something happen to her dads. I think it was a brilliant move. It totally makes sense, right? This is the most important delegation you will ever make. If something (say your prayers) ever happens to you as a parent, the legal guardian you choose will be responsible for raising your children. I can’t think of a more important role than that!
It’s a very overwhelming conversation though that actually makes you face mortality and the possibility of your kids being without their parents. It’s so tough, in fact, that most parents avoid the conversation and don’t formally secure a legal will. You would think it’s a straightforward decision, but there are a lot of factors that come into play.
How did you make that decision? Did you keep it within your blood family? Did you consider the person’s character, relationship with your children, whether they have kids of their own, or age?
I boiled it down to three main factors. 1) True love for my children vs. blood only. We have really close friends who are like family who have been there for my kids their entire lives and know them inside and out. Is that thicker than blood? 2) Can they handle it? Would I want to add this to their plate? My sister has two kids with the thought of having a third. Would they be able to add two or three more kids and stay sane as two full-time working parents? 3) Will they raise them the way I would? What is their parenting style or lifestyle?
Either way, this can be a heavy decision. However, the worst thing to do is to avoid it and not write a will at all. I have to admit that I’m in that awful boat right now. Supposedly, if it’s not legal, the court doesn’t recognize it. Man, now I’m freaking out. What did you do?